Realest Ninja Alive Act IV: Limbaugh VS Alex Keaton

The battle between Freddy Foxxx and Rakim the Master still rages on. Cam’ron stands in the darkness holding his bling. Martha Stewart prowls through the night. And somewhere, in between earth and hell, another battle rages to determine who is [ahem] THE REALEST NINJA ALIVE!!! orangemenace reports live from the scene:

VS

So…Rush seems to have hit a new low, attacking Michael J. Fox recently for ‘faking/over exaggerating’ his Parkinson’s symptoms. I don’t know if Rush is actually nuts [although I would say probably] or if maybe his illegal immigrant/underpaid maid screwed up the illegal prescription medications in his bathroom [oh, you don’t remember all that?]. Either way, Fox is one of the most recent people to get attacked on personal grounds for being involved in something Limbaugh is against [in this case, Fox has been doing ads for stem cell research…something we won’t get into here].

So check out is this [amusing] article from Slate on the recent verbal assault, and Limbaugh’s general insanity. Here’s a taste:

“I once had a friend who listened to Rush Limbaugh three hours a day. He was a Republican operative. He sat in my apartment, wearing headphones, while I worked. He swore that if I put on the headphones for 10 minutes, I’d be hooked. So I put them on.
Inside the headphones was another world. Everyone in this world thought the same way, except liberals, and they were only cartoon characters, to be defeated as though in a video game. In the real world, my friend was unemployed and had been staying with me, rent-free, for two months. But inside the headphones, he could laugh about welfare bums instead of pounding the pavement.”

I refuse to actually link to Rush, so you can search for the specific comments yourself, although I would advise against it. But like I said, check the Slate article.

[note: Mike’s previously mentioned breakout character, Alex Keaton, was a staunch republican. ah the irony…]

And we’re not quite sure who’s gonna win this one folks… but stay tuned! One things for sure, winner of these faces either Foxxx or Rakim. My money’s on fox. The crown would love to see Fox vs. Foxxx.

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Becoming Astronauts

There are also parallels between Indian philosophy and contemporary marketing theory, which has shifted away from manipulating consumers to collaborating with them. “Marketing has tended to use the language of conquest,” says Kellogg professor Mohanbir S. Sawhney, a Sikh who discusses the relevance of the Bhagavad Gita to business on his Web site. Now the focus is on using customer input to dream up new products, Sawhney says, which “requires a symbiotic relationship with those around us.”

karma and capitalism at keepmedia

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Stephen Colbert : Monarch ?On Notice?

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As those who frequent the site may have noticed, we have had a few posts [also here & here] about a great American hero and ninja extraordinaire: Stephen Colbert. Well, in an effort to do our part, and fight the good fight, we here at MNP are requesting that Stephen do his civic duty [and maybe give us a shout for the free press he gets here] and place the Monarch Butterfly [at least those in North America] ‘On Notice‘.

While seemingly harmless [and orange] at first glance, the Monarch is a menace to this great nation. Every spring they fly north into the United States from Mexico. Once here, they feed on our plants and flowers, and lay there eggs….only to return again to Mexico for the winter to lamp in the sun while sippin’ margaritas [maybe not] on the beach.
Whats to be done? Well, a giant butterfly net along the border would be good, for starters…

Do your part!! Email Stephen yourself here [don’t forget to link to this post].
Make your own ‘On Notice’ board here.

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Irony, ain?t it a bitch


After engaging in a massive PR campaign to counteract the depictions of it in the soon-to-be released Borat movie and show the world that it really is an industrialized, modern nation, Kazakhstan’s central bank has committed a small blunder which can only be described as ironic: they spelled ‘bank’ wrong on 80% of their newly-issued bank notes, leading to a massive recall.  Seems as though all those government funds spent on the ad campaign might have been better directed towards a spell check program for the central bank’s printing program…

Story via Yahoo! News

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Cuz the Bush?s Love the Children[?]


So, let’s start from the beginning. Some of you may have heard of an educational program in this country called ‘No Child Left Behind‘, instituted during Bush’s first term [this isn’t commentary for or against that program, which remains controversial as it supposedly encourages ‘teaching to the test’].

Neil Bush is our president’s younger brother, who seems to have been a little bit of a failure until recently. What changed you ask? Well, I’ll tell you. Neil is now experiencing measured success distributing a new teaching aid, ‘curriculum on wheels‘ [or COWs], that basically uses various multimedia methods of covering information that will most likely be seen on the state testing material in place due to ‘No Child Left Behind’. It projects videos, plays music and lectures…basically, its a teahcer in a box with all the answers to the test. Backed by some Saudi investors, Neil has sold 1,700 of the units since 2005, mainly in Texas, where Houston’s school system has recently authorized 200,000 dollars for COW purchases.

Now, I don’t want to throw around assumptions here, but let’s all think for a moment. President’s [loser] brother, getting rich off of a questionable education reform system, instituting pseudo teacher-replacing technology, in Texas, with financial backing from Saudi investors. Only things missing are some hanging chads in Florida.

I mean, a machine that ‘teaches’ children government controlled information through sing-song memorization? I guess Orwell and Huxley are off the reading list.

Article from BusinessWeek
Neil Bush’s company, Ignite!, and the COWs

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And Another One [Kofi]

Jay-Z is tricking the tricksters! He’s out of retirement, has his #45 album coming out, debuted his new music video on Monday Night football with Danika and friends andddddd hes now the “co-brand director” of Bud Select of Anheuser-Busch.

“Jay-Z also will be involved in providing direction on other upcoming Budweiser Select television ads, radio spots, print campaigns and several high-profile events.”

It’s not that simple though, Jay is also allies with Coke who is in the midst of a high-profile campaign across the board on peer-to-peer networks. If you can’t make money selling records, get sponsored and give it to people for free!

If you are unsure why this is all relevant, please consult this Rhymepays encyclopedia.

[Ed. it should be interesting when Jaz-O drops the truth!- you’re getting paid off it or youre not!]

from adage and online.wsj

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Idiots and Politics

A list of the top ten dumbest congressmen (and women).

10. Senator Jim Bunning (R-KY)

Bunning is a Hall of Fame pitcher who, during his eight years in office, has shown “little interest in legislation that doesn’t concern baseball,” writes Time magazine. And Kentucky doesn’t even have a major-league baseball team. His campaign style is so completely unhinged that political observers openly speculated in 2004 that the then-73-year-old was suffering from dementia or Alzheimer’s. “His is a tragic case of descent into senility,” says one Hill staffer, “except without the ‘descent’ bit.” To scotch the rumors, Bunning was forced to hold a press conference and offer up doctor’s reports.  

Among his antics that year: Telling a group of GOP fundraisers that his Italian-American opponent, Daniel Mongiardo, physically resembled Saddam Hussein’s sons, Uday and Qusay; referring on the stump to the tragic terror attacks of November 11, 2001; and adding a federal security detail to his campaign in the firm conviction that members of Al Qaeda—the masterminds of November 11—had targeted him for elimination. (”There may be strangers among us,” he darkly informed a Paducah TV crew.)

The piece de resistance, though, was a debate with Mongiardo: Bunning notified event organizers at the eleventh hour that he was tied up with legislative business in Washington and would have to participate via satellite. During the event it was painfully obvious that the incumbent was delivering his debate points with the aid of a teleprompter, violating the event’s ground rules. And whatever urgent business Bunning claimed to be in town for couldn’t have had anything to do with his job—the Senate had gone into recess the previous Monday.

If you’re roliing as hard as I was, check out the full list via Radar Online, a special report.

[Ed. Thanks to Pheez for sending in the last two]

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Watch them Ninjas that be Close to You

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 just had to use this picture again
 didn’t ya?

 

WASHINGTON (Reuters) – Want to catch a senator napping during a congressional hearing? Or letting a possible racial slur slip out at a campaign rally

Then log on to Internet video-sharing Web sites like YouTube.com — the latest weapon in U.S. politics where a candidate’s missteps can be viewed by hundreds of thousands of people.

Political campaigns for the November 7 congressional elections have sent out mass e-mails with links to videos of opponents in unscripted, often embarrassing, situations.

That’s basically how I got terminated.  They caught me on tape playing Ninjaaaa Golf!

Story Via Reuters

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Circle of Protection: Afghani! Troops Lack Mana to Burn 10ft Tall Plants

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“Sir, three years ago before I joined the army, I never thought I’d say ‘That damn marijuana’.”

The Canadians have  recognized the evils of battling the evil herb as viewed pictures from this personal web-journal.

The few, the proud, the blazed as sh!t.  It can’t be that much different than Canada is for real, though.  This just goes to show that where there’s ninjas…

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“We tried burning them with white phosphorous — it didn’t work. We tried burning them with diesel — it didn’t work. The plants are so full of water right now … that we simply couldn’t burn them,” he said.

This should be telling you something guys… they just ain’t ready to be picked yet.

afghani defense 1

I’m reminded of a John Holt song.  Why do I feel like every time I plant a seed, they say, “kill it before it grow”?…. so I shot I shot I shot.

“The challenge is that marijuana plants absorb energy, heat very readily. It’s very difficult to penetrate with thermal devices. … And as a result you really have to be careful that the Taliban don’t dodge in and out of those marijuana forests,” he said in a speech in Ottawa, Canada.

And who’da thunk the Taliban would ever reach ninja status? Thanks to Jay for sending this in!

 

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Friday The Thirteenth

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“The doomed space mission Apollo 13, made into a feature film with Tom Hanks, was launched on 13 April at 13:13 local time, while a recent interpretation of the number has brought another interesting, if unsettling point. Several serial killers have 13 letters in their names: Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer and Theodore (Ted) Bundy all have this honour. In a strange coincidence, so do the words Prime Minister.
So how did the two mix? Well, we can return to The Da Vinci Code and one of the periods of history it highlights…”

background check at planetgonecrazy.blogspot

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