Category Archives: politics

God Bless[ed some] America[ns with intelligence]

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From www.writeinbush.com:

We don’t need to worry about the details, we just trust in God and vote our faith. When we step out in faith and leave the details to God, there’s no limit to what can be accomplished.

Has to be a joke, right?

What A Guy …

This is the new John McCain commercial set to air on national television:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpyOSLZw8qo[/youtube]

There is one line in there that’s more nauseating than most. Something like, “In a dangerous world with a broken economy,” … what? John McCain will make it more dangerous and put us further in debt? Two days ago, John McCain said that he would balance the national budget in his first term, should he be elected. This ninja here wants to know how he plans to do that. But that’s one of McCain’s secrets. In the past, candidates have offered some numbers to support their claims. But McCain’s got that one covered: if you don’t give any numbers, there’s no way people can do the calculations to shoot you down. Genius. Considering his plans to potentially lower taxes and maintain our current foreign policy that would leave him with only two more miracles before he would be canonized, right?

As far as the world being more dangerous … my ninja, please. I’m not sure I can get a ninja to tell me that this place is any more insecure (security-wise) than it was 12 years ago. Don’t buy it, folks.

John McCain Knows Iran…

NOT!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yr6Va7PEBg8[/youtube]

McCain criticizes Obama on being willing to talk to Iran’s leaders and in doing so may got some basic facts wrong.

Ayatollah Khomeni is considered the Supreme Leader of the secular state, and McCain knows that most Americans don’t know that or basic history of Iran.

McCain just keeps offering samples of his ineptitude. Isn’t it really sad that this guy is supported by millions of Americans? Millions , ninjas, millions.

This ninja is considering repatriating.

McCain: 100% Full of $hit

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEtZlR3zp4c[/youtube]

Wow senator…I’m so glad that you’ve brought us the ‘straight talk express’.

I realize that we see the media in these clips calling BS on specific issues at any given moment – but why aren’t montages like this just being blatantly played on the fake news [fake news = FOX, CNN, MSNBC, etc]? The man is wholly unfit to be our president.

Economists? Who Needs ‘Em

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pbfa2WJuqc0[/youtube]

Doesn’t want to listen to economists? As if they’re the problem – not ignorant politicians who are more concerned with ‘winning’ and power than actually doing their job…

Didn’t this fool go to Wellesley?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DrQapB5xTpA[/youtube]

Clinton Takes PA

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No surprise here, ninjas. Hillary Clinton can chalk one up in the W column tonight, winning the Pennsylvania primary by  a projected 8 points with 30% more precincts to report in. Let’s just hope she doesn’t let it go to her head … haaaaaaaa. I’m so sad.

This is Pennsylvania, folks. Barack Obama was never supposed to be close in this one, and Clinton is already trying to spin the victory as people being unsure about the viable nature of his candidacy. Apparently she forgot that she was supposed to have this in the bag back on or before Super Tuesday. And she would have gotten away with it, too. If it weren’t for those damned free thinkers and their ideals …

It is nice to see that the major media outlets are largely saying that this victory is merely allowing her campaign to continue to exist, rather than giving her any sort of boost she shouldn’t receive.

Obliteration!

Hillary Clinton forgot one important factor to consider when she said that she would retaliate on Israel’s behalf should Iran attack them with nuclear weapons: ISRAEL IS A NUCLEAR POWER! They have nukes to take care of themselves. And you better believe they have some sort of First-Strike retaliatory plan.

I wonder what our Pennsylavia ninjas are thinking today when they sneak into the booths… Check back for the results tonight.

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At Long Last

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[Apparently these guys do a piss poor job, eh? What's this "global warming" all about, then? I sort of want them all to be like the dude from Ghostbusters]

April 22, finally. A shuriken for the ninja who can tell me when the last primary or caucus was . . . What? Mississippi on March 11? Damn. That’s right, ninjies, tomorrow is the big Pennsylvania primary. Barack Obama has steadily narrowed the divide in the polls there over the last few weeks to just a single digit margin. Ninjas suspect that Hillary will win by 6-9 points. This whole process is really brutal.
Also, my ninjas, Earth Day is upon us. Us ninjas in the dojo really dig mother nature. She’s fly. Nice and round … You should bounce around the site here and check out the celebration at every page: the green site, the music site, the architecture site, our resident robot ninja, and of course, www.myninjaplease.com. In honor of Mother Earth’s Day [and our forefathers] here are some figures that give you a sense of our great United States’ contributions to 21st century global condition:

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Just some things for you ninjas to consider while you go along living your lives here in the States, and everywhere else around this small, small world.

Check back at the end of the day for the results from today’s Pennsylvania race.

MNP Reports 4/21/08

Here’s a transcript from our ninja down in Philly. She’s currently working to obtain the coveted status of MNP’s first dedicated on-the-scene correspondent.

Laura G. is a body double by day and ninja by night. When not teaching the youth about today’s mathematics she volunteers part-time at Obama’s Philadelphia campaign.

Here’s her short-but-necessary take on what is happening, posted without graphic interruption.

This is an exciting time to be in Philadelphia. Political signs, pins, and t-shirts are infiltrating the streets and people are talking. They are talking a lot. This morning, on my five-minute walk from the train to work, I heard at least three conversations about what was going to happen tomorrow. A woman shouted to a man wearing an Obama hat, “I mean, I respect guy, but he ain’t got a chance of winning.” The man with the hat gave a smirk and continued on, explaining to his friend that Obama understands the larger picture because his heritage embodies the larger picture, that he gets how to deal with a variety of people because he grew up around a diverse group of people. For this reason, he believes in the man. He believes the man will really change the country.

I am not a political person. It is hard for me choose sides, to stand for something, to pick someone based on what say to get votes. I am never quite certain I “know” enough to really choose. And choosing between Hillary and Obama was especially hard because ultimately I wanted to be able to support either of them in November. But for some reason I wanted to be a part of this election. So I did my research. I picked my person and I became an intern in the Obama office two weeks ago. Not because I am necessarily “against” Hilary but because I am “for” Obama.

Three days ago, I walked through the city, all the way down to Independence Hall where the Obama rally was being held. I began my journey at the city center, where Hillary supporters were holding up “Honk for Hillary” signs and screaming at passing cars. There were about ten people total and they had all lost their voices. Cars were honking, people were cheering and there was a general sense of urgency amongst the crowd. As I continued down to Independence Hall, the clash began to happen–a clash that exist in every pocket of the city right now, a clash that both terrifies me and brings me energy. People with Hillary pins bumping against people with Obama t-shirts, and people with Hillary hats passing people Mamas For Obama stickers; the division is so stark and so charged. Soon, it became Obama territory and the crowd was full of an energy that I have never experienced. It is this abstract “hope” that people keep on talking about but there really is no other word for what I think (and I only know from the one side) that people are experiencing. It’s why there were 35,000 people out of their homes, waiting for over five hours to see Obama at a last minute rally and why a lady in her seventies, covered in Obama paraphernalia, used all the voice she had left to tell people where to get their red and/or blue tickets. And this hope—this overwhelming support for a candidate no one thought would get very far–is, in my opinion, slightly scary. It is scary because it is so easily felt, so accessible, so tangible and if it goes away tomorrow, next week, next month, or even in November, the loss will feel as tangible and it will feel huge. I worry about that.

Today, one day before the election, I sit with seven other people on the “New Media” team and blast myspace messages about getting out the vote. In the next room over, volunteers are screaming, every hour on the hour, “Fired up and Ready to go!” The office is disgusting at this point, empty Starbucks cups and Qdoba wrappers are falling out of the trashcans and fluorescent lights make it look that much worse. But people are ready for something to happen, ready to work all night and keep the vote close because they have to. Because if they don’t, they and everyone else they’ve convinced, might just deflate, might just fall apart. It’s an exciting time to be in Philadelphia.