Obama Thrives on MNP ‘Bump’ - Receives New Backers

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Think it’s a coincidence that Barack Obama won 11 straight primaries since our official Feb. 8th endorsement? My Ninja, Please! As my little brother would say, "you must be on that water!"

Unsurprisingly, he is not the first candidate to ride the well-known MyNinjaPlease boost to success. In 1998 Gray Davis of California fame successfully defeated two better-funded democrats in the governor race thanks to a mention on MNP megasite, RobotNinja.

When MNP rescinded its endorsement of tycoon Ross Perot, his campaign - just then growing in momentum - came to a griding halt.

With that said, we felt like it was once again time for the plot to thicken, for MNP to drop another bombshell on your unsuspecting heads.

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You might have heard that Chuck Norris recently endorsed Mike "Small Axe" Huckabee in his bid for the white house. In response, the Governator teamed up with Sylvester "Still-got-it’ StalloneAA and came out in fervent support of John "Lymph Nodes" McCain. Obama (not to be confused with the president from Elektra Assassin) had no response to the formation of what would inevitably be a triad, but by all accounts the presidential hopeful was severely shaken. Up until that moment the ass-kicking potential of his campaign had never been in doubt, with almost 70% of potential voters agreeing that he could "smack the sh*&" out of any of the other candidates as recently as a month ago. Campaign aides were reportedly quivering in fear of "the big two" and the almost inevitable ass-kickery coming their way.

Here’s a quote from an aide who wished to remain anonymous:

It wasn’t so much, the first one that scared me. I mean… I’ve seen "The Octagon" and I wasn’t impressed really except by the mustachios; but Rambo, son? My Ninja, Please!

Not to worry, though, Obama supporters worldwide have a new aide in the fight against Hilary and the republican corps. Action hero Jean Claude Van Damme was sighted in close proximity of the O-man, this past weekend. Could this mean that Mr. Van Damme could soon be endorsing our favorite candidate. Close sources say yes, the rumors are true.

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To quote Uncle Ruckus on the possibility of a Van Damme endorsement:

"Jean Claude Van Damme is the greatest fighter of all time. He can crush a grown man’s head between his butt cheeks!"

Other action heroes are also rumored to be joining the Obama camp, including Mr. T and Mr. Miagi, both official "Misters" whose titles added to the list of the B-Man’s supporters could bring a slew of other influential windfalls.

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If these rumors are true, and we think they are, we could be in for a level of ass-beatery previously unseen in a presidential election (in America).

"The action hero ‘bump’, while unanticipated and for some, unwelcome, could end up being almost as significant as the MNP bump this year… but only time will tell" - Anderson Cooper

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Posted: February 25th, 2008
at 8:35am by Black Ock


Categories: myninjaplease,too good to be true,mnp is for the children,politricks,9th dan

Comments: 3 comments



 

3 Responses to 'Obama Thrives on MNP ‘Bump’ - Receives New Backers'

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  1. Brilliant.

    phlop

    25 Feb 08 at 1:18 pm

     

  2. Greatest post ever. He’s sure to win the White House now. And as thanks, I think we should all get pardons [for future crimes…let’s be real, we’ll probably need ’em], all our debt wiped clean…no more paying taxes…I’ll start a list.

    orangemenace

    25 Feb 08 at 2:25 pm

     

  3. i don’t think that photo of stallone adequately exhibits his nasty nasty veins

    jessie

    25 Feb 08 at 9:42 pm

     


 

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